I love Islam and cream soda

If our criminal justice system is the "New Jim Crow", and if our prisons are neo-plantations, then our network of county and city jails are akin to slave ships - the "New Amistad", if you will.  There's an appropriate visual when you consider cells like those in Colorado's Arapahoe County Detention Center that have been modified from double to triple bunks - at a glance they resemble the cramped bowels of slave ships where African inmates-as-cargo were lain in tight stacks and rows.      Appropriate analogies abound - like slaves, jail inmates are a valuable commodity; local lockups get paid per body and operate like any business by cutting costs of operation as much as possible to maintain create revenue. Slave traders made and maintained profits by providing the barest minimum for slaves to survive transport to auction, often leaving them naked with no medical care and feeding them scraps for food. Jail menus provide so minimal calories and...

For several reasons might voting in this year's midterm elections. I was proud to have voted in a state with the second highest percentage of voter turnout. Colorado trailed only Minnesota, who I was happy to see voted another Muslim into Congress. On the candidate front, two races were of interest to me: governor and Atty. general. I voted for the victorious Jared Polis mostly because walker Stapleton was an offshoot of his races grandfather (I did not know Polis was gay, and that is the point, is it not?) Stapleton touted a policy of stripping funding from schools to use torch prisons - a policy of doubled-dipped racism. The woeful state of education in our country is a consequence of white rage over school desegregation, and the cancerous growth of incarceration is a product of similar origin, aimed to steer blacks and other minorities out of mainstream society. I voted against George Brauchler running for the Atty. General in response to his malicious over prosecut...

While locked down fighting (and beating) a frame-up, I read books and did pull-ups... Here's what I polished off in 10 months (Feb-Dec '18) *disclaimer, I absolutely did indeed read every title listed. Aries Decision (Ludlum/Mills) White Rage (Carol Anderson)  must read! Black Pain (T. Williams) Rules of Betrayal Naughtier Than Nice Anthology of American Poetry (Rita Dove) Aces High

In the pit of my belly, John Wick's dog just got killed - but presently, the dominate feeling up in my heart is freedom - and gratitude. There is an ayat of Quran that quotes Zakariya praying, stating to God that "I have never been unsuccessful in my prayer to You" - It is a verse that rings throughout my mind in context to my ordeal. I have questioned a lot during the last 10 months but my faith in Him seeing my thru did not waver. I am first grateful to Him, good times and bad.

When an inmate gets out of prison, it is a rebirth - and there are questions they confront in order to start a new life.  One of the most important ones is, "Where am I going to live?"  As a society, we have no idea of the reality that the majority of inmates get out of prison and that they will become our neighbors. I know this - because I was that inmate, and I am now "that neighbor".

By 2007, I had been training at Edge MMA (then known as Grapplers Edge), for about 3 quiet years, concentrating mostly on Jujitsu and nogi grappling. One Saturday, I was visiting the Denver County Jail as a volunteer chaplain for Islamic services​, driving directly from an Open Mat grappling session, so I was wearing an Edge t-shirt at the time. One of the deputies approached me in the hallway and asked me where I had gotten my shirt. I told him that I got it from the school that I train at. The deputy frowned and replied that he trained there as well and had never seen me there... “Hmmm…Is this another of those challenges?” I wondered - it was commonly known at the jail that I was an ex-con who was now providing religious services to inmates and I had clashed with a deputy or two who did not necessarily respect me or what I was doing because of my past; so my hackles went up immediately at this possibly becoming another one of those incidents. I told the deputy that I had prima...

I imagine that at some point in the life of every devout person, they confront a crises of faith. In Islamic tradition, Moses dealt with his by asking God to show Himself to him – a foolish request for sure, but his insistence and reasoning (to strengthen his heart/faith) underscore how deep this conflict ran for him. Muhammad had a similar crisis when there was a pause in revelation that caused him intense self-doubt and made him fear that God was disappointed in him for some reason unbeknownst to him. Personally, I’d like to think of myself as adamant in my belief that God exists and that my life should reflect this belief – in this I think I am stayed pretty clear and consistent – BUT, there have been many moments that this certainty has been tested and met with despair and desperation. Exhibit A would be my most recent 90 day stint in the joint. To be brief, I had returned this past October thru January for a “turnaround” for a technical violation of parole after a hearing pr...

I am going to talk I've been back to prison for parole revocations twice now, because I was upfront, vocal, and honest about why I first went to prison in 2013. Simply put, I went because my ex-wife Dominique made false claims of domestic violence against me. Claims that began falling apart as my case progressed. However, in the middle of my marital turmoil, I made attempts at reconciling with Dominique, despite the fact of being barred from interacting with her by automatic protection order. That love-blind decision came back to bite my behind when, as her hoax began to unravel, the DA salvaged her prosecution by filling 19 cases of misdemeanor violation of protection order. I was literally facing an unprecedented 19 years in the county jail. It seemed improbable, if not absurd, until another local defendant made news being sentenced to an unprecedented county jail sentence of over 10 years. Long story short, I took a deal for an "open" sentence, expecting proba...

The Universe always speaks and sometimes we are given a brief ability to listen. Tonight, I got a message… It was actually a 3-part message that culminated tonight. The first part was sent earlier today – I was in a meeting with a community-based organization and one of the ladies there shook my hand and remarked how soft my skin was. No biggie except that everyone in the office rolled with laughter as I stood there embarrassed – I mean, I’m a pretty manly dude (I think), heck, even a fighter, so I don’t imagine having soft hands, not the kind that get remarked on. Now let’s backtrack a bit to several months ago, while I was in prison. I got an online generated message from an old friend, “Rose” (not her real name), totally out of the blue.   Rose and I really don’t know each other but we have been friends for nearly 20 years. We have never met face to face or even had a direct conversation. We met originally on a couple religious message boards run by MSN, way back wh...

Relating the story of Jonah, the Quran has it that it was his anger at the people of Nineveh for refusing his message of salvation that led him to flee from them and eventually end up swallowed by a big fish/whale. I have an inkling of what that type of anger feels like, having been in the belly of the beast (prison) once as a teenager/young adult and inexplicably again recently (being in my 40s). I am sure that Jonah’s own belly burned white hot with righteous indignation that covered up feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. My own fire burned during my latest stint fueled by the fact that it came after nearly 2 decades of turning my life around from my first time down, as well as this latest conviction being the result of largely false accusations of domestic violence.